After two years and change, we’ve become a real boy. Click the logo above or visit www.GonzoGeek.com to see the brand new site.

I came to a realization this week.

That realization?  That my kids are getting older and at some point I’m going to have to explain the noble pursuit that is GonzoGeek to them.

Sure, they understand that dear old dad and some of his friends have a website, but they don’t really understand what that means or involves.  It became even more apparent the other night when, upon looking at the forthcoming design of our update, they asked me why we had girls in bikinis on there.

That led us into a discussion of traffic and hits.  It also led to so seriously glazed eyes.

What?  Why yes, I did mention an update.  Thanks for paying attention.

We’ve been promising an updated website since the end of 2010 and now, dear reader(s), its arrival is imminent.  Imminent as in Monday I’m told.  When you drop by on Monday you should see a whole new look for us here at the ‘Geek.  Its a change we’re VERY excited about.

And that’s not our only big news. 

We are currently in discussions with a certain columnist.  If things go well, he’ll be bringing you his musings on all things sporting and entertaining.

But wait!  There’s more.

Just this very morning we got confirmation that a quartet of your favorite Geeks will be attending Comic-Con International in San Diego (Whale’s Vagina for all you German speakers out there) in July.  More details on that in the coming weeks.  Just know that we’ve been planning that one for a while and we’re all VERY excited about the chance to attend and report on the premiere Geek event of the year.

Don’t worry, we won’t forget to dance with who brung us.

Cheesecake anyone?

This week’s selection comes from Aamir.  Here’s what he had to say about her…

This week’s Cheesecake is Anna “Aya” Stefanowicz, vocalist for the Polish band UNSUN.  Aya is married to Maurycy “Mauser” Stefanowicz, who is the guitar player for UNSUN and ex-member of the highly lauded Polish death metal outfit called VADER.  She’s got a great voice, is very easy on the eyes, and has a really cute Eastern European accent.  UNSUN are easily and quickly tagged with the “Gothic-Metal” stamp, but I feel they are a lot more accessible than that.  The music is heavy, but the melodies and arrangements are rooted in Pop sensibility.  The latest UNSUN record is called “Clinic For Dolls” and was released in October of 2010.  The production is killer sounding and the songs are catchy, really fun and kinda kitchy too…but who doesn’t like a little bit of cheese now and then.

Well done, Aamir.  Well done.

On to the links. 

Linkfrogging! Ribbit!

 Get your old-school insults here.

 Dads: The Original Hipsters

 Spaceman hunt suffers a blow.

The Future: According to Google Search results.

The first zombie-proof house.

Gangsta-rap video cliches

RIP ATX, hellooo San Marcos!

Two morons find love…with each other. Truly though, god bless ‘em, and may they live forever after in blissful happiness. We all deserve the chance to do that.

Weakest NBA promotion ever.

 Aircraft carrier college hoops.

 10 autobiographies every comedy buff should read.

 David Yow discusses his visual art.

 A 35-year, 100,000 toothpick tour of the Bay Area.

The 25 Essential cult movies since 1983!

The Dude and Green Lantern team up.  Hold on, should that be Obadiah Stane and Green Lantern team up? 

Superman goes rogue.

James Franco to study at U of H.  Phi Slamma Jamma to be replaced by Phi Chokka Tokka.

And finally, in honor of our upcoming trip to Comic-Con, COSPLAY photos.

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• Friday LinkFrogging – 4/22/11 (gonzogeek.wordpress.com)
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• Maine Update (deborahshapiro.wordpress.com)

 

Well here we are, 1/111th of the way to our epic Episode 666 blow out, and just when you thought everything was going to turn normal, J&L get served the surprise retirement of founding Judas Priest guitarist K.K. Downing to dissect . Along the way Loond also checks out Dokken live, the duo give Startruckers a listen, Loond goes  retro connoisseur with Blind Illusion, and they both  near meltdown regarding rumors that Big4Radio might permanently replace Liquid Metal on SiriusXM satellite radio.

METAL! – J&L

[Potentially NSFW]

And for download…

J&L Episode 006 – KK to Big4

Follow Jibbies on Twitter @MetalJibbies

Music featured this episode:

Judas Priest – ‘Sinner’ (Unleashed In The East)

Dokken – ‘Kiss of Death’

Startruckers – ‘Down The River’

Blind Illusion – ‘Blood Shower’

Roadsaw – ‘Electric Heaven’

[Ed. Note: Liquid Metal will be back this Saturday, Apr. 30. It turned out to be a false alarm made worse by uninformed customer service interfacing with passionate and upset metal fans. At the time of recording, however, no-one really knew what was going on, and it seemed like a very real possibility.]

On tour now, and coming to J&L very soon…ACCEPT

We’ll start off with the SOTD from last week:  Moon Knight.

There's a bad moon on the rise!

Next, we’ll begin cleanup in Adobe Illustrator.  Since I want to register a few more hits for this particular post, cleanup and finished images are available after the jump.

If I have the good sense to erase most of my errant lines, clean us is relatively easy.   If I don’t, it takes forever.   It is also during the clean up phase that I begin to figure out what I do and don’t like about the pose.  And since I’m open to happy accidents, erasing a line here or there  usually works in my favor.

Here in figure 2 you’ll see the tweaking process about halfway through.  I’ve already decided on a background, so it’s complete.  The cape is going to get its own layer so it’s gone for now.

Hmmm. Maybe I should do the Liefeld feet.

Now, here’s where all my time went.   I had already dropped in a fair amount of shadows when I decided that I HATED the feet.    I mean really, how do you make someone appear knock-kneed AND bowlegged at the same time?

Suck.  Suck.  Suck.

Should have gone the Liefeld route and drawn him standing in smoke, or I could have gone the Full Liefeld and added shoulder pads, a giant gun and a sword, and cross hatched the background.  I might have also made one of his eyes glow.

Time for some re-edits, which means that I printed out what I had, and sketched a new body over it.  This time I got the legs where I wanted them, scanned in the new drawing and cleaned it up all over again.

If its worth doing right, do it at least twice is my motto.

That done, I finally finished clean up and added a couple of details.  Overall, I like it….otherwise I’d be doing it still.

Enjoy

KA-POW!

-Stephe

TROLLHUNTER is the story of a group of Norwegian film students that set out to capture real-life trolls on camera after learning their existence has been covered up for years by a government conspiracy. A thrilling and wildly entertaining film, TROLLHUNTER delivers truly fantastic images of giant trolls wreaking havoc on the countryside, with darkly funny adherence to the original Norwegian folklore.

TROLLHUNTER screened at both the Tribeca an Sundance film festivals.  It will be available on Magnolia On-Demand May 6th and in theaters starting June 10th.

You can watch the trailer after the jump.

Related Articles

• The Troll Hunter Trailer Looks Horrifically Funny (screenhead.com)
• The Horrors of Tribeca 2011 (dreadcentral.com)
• Make a Date with the Troll Hunter! (dreadcentral.com)
• Early Buzz: Kung Fu Panda 2 and Puss in Boots (slashfilm.com)

Good Friday to you all.

We’re back to once again take a trip to the corners of the internet, both sacred and profane. Why?  Because its what we do.  We’re digital explorers.  We bring ‘em back alive and let you view from behind the glass.

Earlier this week, I was lamenting to the missus that I hadn’t come up with a suitable cheesecake selection for this week.  We haven’t hit the summer movie season which makes my life SO much easier and nobody has done anything new and/or mock worthy.

My wife, who gets the feature, said, “you know, this weekend is associated with rabbits. Why don’t you use someone who’s been a Playboy bunny?”

Or words to that affect.

Smart woman my wife.

Say hello to Jenny McCarthy won’t you?

Ms. McCarthy first rose to fame as the 1993 Playmate of the Year.  From there she moved into television, most notably as the co-host of MTV’s Singled Out.  It was there that she honed her brassy broad persona.  Since then she’s acted steadily in the movies and on television.  It hasn’t all been rosy.  Her 2006 movie Dirty Love was eviscerated by the critics and took home a wagon full of Razzies.

In recent years, Ms. McCarthy has become an outspoken autism advocate.

On to the links.

Linkfrogging! Ribbit!

 The most anticipated (fake) films of 2011.

 Get stoked!

 Scientists teleport Schrodinger’s cat

 ‘I Know What I Saw’ – History Channel UFO doc.

 Foo Fighters perform ‘Wasting Light’ live in its entirety.

 And Grohl explaining the craft of turning an arena into a punk club.

 Iggy action figure.

 Some ideas are just plain bad.

 Make your own music. It’s fun. And easy!

 And this one’s even more fun and easier.

 The alcopop wars continue.

 Five street scams dogging Houston right now.

 Big Brother at work in Michigan.

 Local news FAIL.

 …and again. This guy has the hand of death.

 ‎“Pepper spray is not to be fucked with because it is some bad sheet”

 Swedish Sensations Films: A Clandestine History of Sex, Thrillers, and Kicker Cinema

The Dude Records.

Hi-Yo Silver…AWAY!

Fantastic Forefathers.

Hidden in plain sight during World War II.

Animated Dark Knight Returns?  Color me skeptical.

As it turns out Norse mythology is public domain.  Witness Almighty Thor!

And finally, bet you didn’t know these cartoons were voiced by celebrities.

Charlton who?

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Greetings from the Land of ‘Geek kids.

Today would normally be Tax Day, but since Washington, D.C. is closed down for Emancipation Day (?) you’ve got until Monday to “render unto Caesar.”

Until then, why don’t you let us take your mind off all that with some links and cheesecake.

This week’s selection is the very rare double dip.  True, we’ve been featuring two pictures of our weekly selections for some time now, but today, for only the second time ever, we’ll be featuring two different ladies.

Why?

Simple really. 

Scream 4 opens today and as Wes Craven attempts to resurrect his Ghostface slasher franchise, we thought we’d do our part by featuring the ladies most associated with the franchise.

First up, above, say hello to Courtney Cox.

The former Friend and current resident of Cougar Town (make your own joke.  They do.), Ms. Cox plays intrepid reporter Gale Weathers in the series.  She’s been stalked by the Ghostface killer and David Arquette.  She escaped the killer, but got knocked up and cheated on by Arquette.  I don’t think that would have happened if she’d stuck with Bat-Man.  He’s single-minded that way.

Recently, the paparazzi caught her in the nearly obligatory “nip slip” while on vacation.  Never one to miss an opportunity, David Letterman asked about the incident while showing the picture on his show earlier this week.  Good thing he’s a friend of Bat-Man.

That’s Michael Keaton kids.

 Up next, we’ve got Neve Campbell.  Ms. Campbell plays Sidney Prescott, the de facto heroine of the Scream movies.  She also spent some time with the Salinger five and practicing her Craft.  Still, perhaps her most famous non-Screamy cinematic moment is likely her pool makeout with former cheesecake/Mrs. Sheen, Denise Richards in Wild Things.

That’s why they make the Google kids.

On to the links.

Linkfrogging! Ribbit!

 Venom whiskey ad.

 And primordial Muppets shilling coffee.

 Recent UFO footage compilation.

 Kids being conditioned to be perfect means of production.

 Abraham Lincoln: Vampire Hunter…shooting has started in NOLA.

 A very funny man explains it all.

10 child stars who became broken adults.

25 things you didn’t know about Dave Grohl.

The Shat goes metal.

The worst beverage in America.  Take that Four Loko!

Join S.H.I.E.L.D.  Flying car not guaranteed.

Biggie’s death not such a mystery anymore.

Mick Jagger and David Bowie planning comedy rock movie. 

I guess the video for “Dancing in the Streets” doesn’t count.

Nicolas Cage’s stolen Superman comic recovered.  No word on Penance Stare for thief.

And finally, 6 insane versions of famous cartoons that nearly got made.  (NUMBERED LIST HAT TRICK!)

Happy Hunting ladies!

Related Articles

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Verily!

Every year about this time, we start to get more and more visuals about the upcoming summer movie season.

I love summer movie season.  I don’t have to think or worry about Oscar consideration.  I can just sit back, eat my popcorn, laugh and watch stuff blow up.

And, really, isn’t that what you want in a summer movie?

After reviewing my list for last summer, I can only hope this year’s batch is better (I’m looking at you Jonah Hex).  There are lots of spandex types and some good old fashioned raunchy comedies.

And monkeys in revolt.

Its gonna be a great summer.

Let’s take a look at my highlights, in chronological order.

THOR – The first of the four(!) superhero movies hitting the screen this summer, Thor hits with a mystic Uru hammer.  Yeah, I’m a Thor geek.  Yeah, I’ve been waiting for this one since I was about nine years old.  Yeah, I’m gonna see it on opening weekend.  It has the Destroyer in it!  For the love of Odin, what could be better?

PIRATES OF THE CARIBBEAN 4 – “On Stranger Tides” jettisons most of the original cast and adds Penelope Cruz.  I’ve got to be honest, POTC 3 was a brutal and unentertaining slog.  If they can return to the fun and whimsy of the first movie this will be fun.  If not?  Time to scuttle the whole franchise.

THE HANGOVER 2 – The first Hangover was a surprise hit, proving that, even in today’s PC America, everyone likes to see boys behaving badly.  It was true for Bachelor Party and, to a lesser degree, in Very Bad Things  and its still true today.  Expectations are high for this one.  If they don’t stray too far from the forumula that brung ‘em this one should be a license for the audience to laugh and the studio to print money.

X-MEN:  FIRST CLASS – I can honestly say that this is the first of the recent superhero movies I haven’t been excited about.  I’ll go see it.  I feel obligated.  Still, so much of X2′s goodwill was drained by X3:  The One with Frasier, I just don’t think going “back to the beginning” is the way to salvage the franchise.  We’ll see.  It does feature January Jones as Emma Frost which is something.

GREEN LANTERN – Ryan Reynolds is the ring slinging space cop in the movie DC/Warner Brothers is hoping to build a franchise around.  Opinions vary on Reynolds, but I like the guy.  He plays flawed smug very well.  It will serve him here.  The original trailer left me flat, but the newer one released at Wonder-Con renewed my enthusiasm.  Well, that and living with a pair of 7-year-old boys who are stoked about seeing it.

BAD TEACHER – Much like The Hangover, this one has the potential to be the sleeper of the summer.  Cameron Diaz proved she could do dark comedy in Very Bad Things (two references now?) and Being John Malkovich.  Throw in Jason Segel and Justin Timberlake (awkward!) and you’ve got the makings for an over the top laughfest.

HARRY POTTER AND THE DEATHLY HALLOWS (PART 2) – This is the movie that Warner Brothers wishes would never come out.  Its the end of the line for the Potter franchise.  If the first half of this one is any indication, the series should go out with a bang.  We’ve watched these characters (and actors) grow up.  Now its time to send them off in style.

CAPTAIN AMERICA: THE FIRST AVENGER – Chris Evans’ Human Torch was the only redeeming thing about the Fantastic Four movies.  Now he takes on another Marvel icon in Captain America.  Early trailers are intriguing.  With this movie, Marvel lays down the final piece of the Avengers puzzle.  Here’s hoping they pull it off.

COWBOYS & ALIENS – Favreau, Ford and Craig.  James Bond and Indiana Jones take on aliens in the old West?  I wish I’d been in that pitch meeting.  Then again, with the success of the two Iron Man movies, I’m pretty sure Favreau could have pitched just about anything and gotten a blank check.  This one intrigues me.  Genre mashups are hard to do right, but everyone once in a while someone gets it right.  Favreau could be that guy.

RISE OF THE PLANET OF THE APES – I’m a sucker for PoTA movies.  Just ask my wife, who I forced to sit through Tim Burton’s “reimagining.”  Still this one, which looks to restart the PoTA series from ground zero has my hopes up.  James Franco is your lead, but really, at the end of the day its about the monkeys.  Andy “Gollum” Serkis was motion captured for Caesar.  Also promising.  Too bad Ricardo Montalban didn’t live long enough to see this one.  Still, I bet we could convince Antonio Banderas to play Armando as an homage.

Honorable Mentions:  Conan and Moneyball.

Related Articles

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• Summer action flicks: Wizards, pirates and superheroes (ctv.ca)
• ‘The Avengers’ Puts The Spotlight On Every Character, Says ‘Thor’ Actor Chris Hemsworth (splashpage.mtv.com)
• Chris Evans & Chris Hemsworth: USA Weekend Cover! (justjared.buzznet.com)

After they shoe-horned him into the West Coast Avengers, I kind of lost interest.  The big selling point for me was Bill Sienkiewicz’s art and Doug Moench’s writing.  After that, he sort of morphed (or maybe devolved) into a rich ‘lunatic’, which is more Batman’s forte.   Stephen Platt’s interpretation was kind of interesting in a marshmallow-steroidal sort of way (even the veins in his arms had muscles).  I did jump aboard the Charlie Huston/David Finch train, but jumped off after they left and the art went to hell.

I won’t even get into ‘Body Armor Moon Knight’.  Looked like they modeled him after one of the many Batman action figure variants out there clogging the pegs.

So…here we go, my interpretation of Sienkiewicz’s interpretation of the Moon Knight.   Check it out over a cup o’ joe at Gina’s.

There's a bad moon on the rise!

Ah..and a return to the stumpy legged super-hero!  I guess I could go all Liefeld and just draw him standing in smoke.

Something for later.

-Stephe

In this episode J&L ogle fellow humans, cut lines, see nude skateboarders, go to war against pedicabs, bring you interviews with John Bundy of Naam and Lakis Panagiotopulos of Lecherous Gaze, and recount the glory of Trap Them + All Pigs Must Die‘s tag-team set.

METAL! – J&L

[NSFW]

And for download…

J&L Episode 005 – SXSW 2011 Pt 2

Follow Jibbies on Twitter @MetalJibbies

Music featured this episode:

Red Fang – ‘Reverse Thunder’

Weedeater – ‘Mancoon’

Kylesa – ‘Forsaken’

the Obsessed – ‘Neatz Brigade’

True Widow – ‘I.N.O.’

Trap Them – ‘The Facts’

Rotor – ‘Gnade Dir Gott’