…all of a sudden, the door to the office is flung open and in rides a mysterious cloaked figure on a black steed with red eyes. Crushing pummeling rhythms suddenly fill the air out of nowhere and the figure hoists me up onto the steed. The figure then wields a huge sword and proceeds to slaughter everyone in its midst. The dust settles and the carnage is revealed. Blood stained printer paper, busted monitors, broken keyboards, cubicles in disarray. The steed bellows and rises on its hind legs and then takes flight. We ride into the night sky and the cloak upon the figure is whisked away to reveal a buxom and beautiful female form. She has milky white skin, long straight black hair, and is scantily clad in black leather. She is no mere mortal however. She is the maiden of Metal, the goddess of all that is heavy. I have been chosen by this dark angel to join with her and produce a powerful new spawn of Metal warriors. We burst through the clouds and enter the cosmos to join Yog-Sothoth, Cthulhu, and the other ‘Old Ones’ in the city of R’lyeh. The journey laced with a soundtrack of pure, true, and unadulterated Metal.