21st Century ‘Stand By Me’?

In a role that looks likely to eclipse fellow rocker Steven Adler’s appearance in slasher comedy ‘Dahmer vs. Gacy’ erstwhile Black Label Society/Ozzy axeman Zakk Wylde plays Uncle Jed to title charcter Bones White in late-80s set coming-of-age flick ‘`Bones.’

The movie,  the writing and directorial debut of Frank Pestarino, is described as a “heart-breaking…story [about] four teens growing up in 1989 blue-collar New York” and a bond that ties them together for life. Hmmm. Like…finding a dead body?!

swimming pools, movie stars....

And then there’s the cast. Wylde notwithstanding it consists of a bunch of still unknown but rapidly climbing actors such as 13-year old Jimmy Bennett (‘Bones White’), most recently — and geekily — seen as ‘Young James T. Kirk’ in ‘Star Trek’ and Toe Thompson in Robert Rodriguez’ ‘Shorts.’

Melissa Ordway (’17 Again’) plays ‘Samantha Reeves.’ Jonna Walsh (‘Couple’s Retreat’) is Samantha’s little sis, ‘Kelly Reeves.’ Jesse James plays ‘Derrick Scott’ in this movie. At 20-years old  his resume already stretches back as far as ‘Walker, Texas Ranger,’ ‘As Good As It Gets,’ and ‘Gods and Monsters,’ making stops in “Blow’ and ‘The Butterfly Effect’ along the way. 

Perhaps most Geektastic of all, however, is the casting of Donnie Most, sorry Don Most, as ‘Mr. Reeves,’ the girls’ father. Most remains most famous for  his role as ‘Ralph Malph’ in ‘Happy Days,’ but was also in early 80s series ‘Dungeons & Dragons,’ the late 80s’ ‘Teen Wolf’ animated series, and had one- or two-off appearances in ‘Baywatch,’ ‘Star Trek: Voyager,’ and as the voice of ‘The White Rabbit’ in ‘Sabrina the Teenage Witch.’

I’m not privvy to the plot at all, but the general premise and a cast consisting of a very unlikely musician crossover, a bunch of legit up-and-comers, and a Tarantino-style resurrection move, smell to me like either a classic-in-the-making or an unmitigated disaster.

Mr. Pestarino, it is now largely down to you.

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